One of the common sayings in Connections is Trust the Process. The intention of every one of my programs is to deliver a process that will create profound personal value for every participant who attends. While the process is at times difficult and personally challenging, it leads every one of us down a path of personal discovery and meaningful change. Because it is not an easy process, participants need to trust in it if they are going to experience the value they are looking for. Ultimately it is a process that will develop trust in self and a belief in a higher sense of purpose guiding each of us.
A key to trusting the process is to have some insight into what that process is for. What is the intention of the process? I think that most of us show up for a personal development program because we want more contentment, satisfaction and meaning in our lives. We want to feel better about ourselves and the lives we are living. And, I see that happening for individuals in every program. However, I also think there is a very important part of the process that we are not as aware of. It has to do with how the process draws out those internal qualities and spiritual gifts so that we are becoming healthy and productive individuals. The process is very much an education about becoming the best me I can be.
Now, I am like most of you who would like to be a part of a process that makes me feel better about me and my life rather than learn how to be a healthier more productive person. I would rather head for the spa, lounge in a hot tub and have a full body message than to sit through a class on how to run my business. The one will make me feel better but the other will grow me as a person and leader and provide me the opportunity to live my life on purpose.
Unfortunately, the process that will make me the best person I can be is not always an easy process. I have learned the hard way that adversity and challenge is what calls out my character qualities and spiritual gifts. It’s that phrase that I learned very early on as an athlete, no pain, no gain. Pain is often a part of the process to personal growth.
I have recently become painfully aware of that truth. When I was a young athlete I really enjoyed playing contact sports. Unfortunately, playing contact sports pretty much guarantees that you will experience physical injuries. Hockey was one of my favorite sports but playing it cost me lots of my teeth. By the time I was twenty one I had to have my front teeth removed and have a bone scraping procedure to repair the damage. I had a dental bridge inserted at that time which a month ago decided to fall out. So, I went to the dentist to see if there was any way to have the bridge cemented back on. The wishful thinking side of me was hoping that he would not see all the other broken teeth in my mouth that had also been damaged playing sports which had been filled and refilled many times over the years, but which were also falling apart like my bridge. Of course, he saw it all and even took an x-ray of my mouth to show me just how bad things had gotten. Bastard.
And so, the process to fix my teeth had officially begun. In my mind I am thinking, okay, trust the process. How bad can it be? And the reward is to have a healthy mouth full of teeth once again, something I do not believe I have had since I was six years of age.
Long story short, I decided to have a full upper denture, which meant that the dentist would have to remove all the teeth in my upper gums. Trust the process. So, I ask to be put under for this procedure because the dentist yanking at my mouth for a couple of hours did not sound like fun. Well, somehow, he did not get the message because a couple of minutes into the procedure I realize that I am going to be awake for the entire time. Trust the process. It can’t be that bad. It was bad. I was not taking to the freezing well, so, I could feel the tearing and breaking of teeth as he worked. On two occasions I had to stop him and tell him to give me more freezing. Of course, there is lots of bleeding and breathing becomes a challenge. All the while I am being encouraged to relax and that all is going well.
As I am lying in the dentist chair I am acutely aware of how it is taking all of my internal qualities…patience, determination, trust, faith, self control, tolerance, courage, composure and resolve, to stay sitting and not push this man off of me and run out of that room. It reminded me that there was more at stake here than getting a new set of teeth. It was a test to see how I deal with pain and adversity and whether I am willing to put myself in a position where I can grow in those qualities.
This past week has been very challenging in terms of adjusting to a denture. It really affects how I eat and how I speak. The dentist and denturist tell me to trust the process. It will get better and I will be glad that I went through all of this. I have been irritable, frustrated, anxious and even a little depressed as I move toward adjusting to this prosthetic in my mouth. At least now I am aware that I am receiving more than just a new set of teeth. I am growing as a person.
What is some adversity you are going through in your life right now and are you clear what it is producing in your life?
Terry
